The meaning of "disciple"
Excerpt from A Life of Devotion: The Holy Biography of Om Visnupad Srila Bhakti Pramod Puri Goswami Maharaj
By Devamaẏī dāsi
Śrīla [Bhakti Pramod] Purī Mahārāj's sweet affectionate dealings with his disciples do not mean that Mahārāj has no expectations from his disciples regarding their devotional practices and their dedication to his mission. On the contrary, his expectations are high and uncompromising. He has said, ``What is the meaning of the word śiṣẏa (disciple)? It means `one who should be instructed, controlled, and disciplined by Guru.' You can look it up in the dictionary. But here I see Guru is somewhere and the disciple is somewhere else [not just physical distance]. I have some disciples like that. And when something needs to be done, none of them can be found. They will come and offer daṇḍavats with great show. And that will be the end of the matter. Some come here to see me as if it is a few days' vacation." So even though he is affectionate and merciful to all his disciples, he distinguishes between those who are dedicated and those who are not so dedicated. He never cares about being glorified. In his disciples he is always looking for Vaiṣṇav qualities, and an earnest desire to serve, chant, and discuss Hari-kathā.
Mahārāj's disciples have come from all over India, from all over the world, and from all walks of life. Among them are businesspeople, homemakers, doctors, engineers, lawyers, scientists, writers, shopkeepers, and so on and so forth. Mahārāj sees them only as souls, as eternal servants of Kṛṣṇa and his Gurudev, Śrīla Prabhupād [Bhaktisiddhānta Saraswatī Ṭhākur]. He expects only vaiṣṇavatā from them---only service to Hari, Guru, and Vaiṣṇav.
If Mahārāj thinks someone should be corrected, he does that privately. He would not criticize or chastise someone in front of everyone. But he will praise someone in front of everyone, when that person is not present. It is very apparent that Mahārāj is only concerned about his disciples' spiritual well-being, and not about pleasing anyone to boost their ego. His disciples may praise or criticize each other to him, but they cannot influence Mahārāj's thoughts or actions in any way. They all see that his praise and chastisement are very fair and consistent. There is not a tinge of any mundane consideration there. Yet his disciples are more happy to be chastised than praised. Somehow they feel that to be chastised, they have to have a closer relationship with him.
When Mahārāj is pleased with the sincere efforts of some of his disciples, he repeatedly praises them to others. For example, he says about Śrīpād Gopīnāth Prabhu, "If I had a hundred mouths, I could not praise Gopīnāth enough." By his actions also, he shows how much he loves to have Gopīnāth Prabhu near him. He does not want Gopīnāth Prabhu to leave him and go anywhere else unless it is absolutely necessary. He says, "I tell Gopīnāth everything and ask for his opinion on everything. Gopīnāth understands my desires and remembers all the details of my instructions."
Mahārāj tells his disciples that he is not their real guru, as he has offered them all at the lotus feet of Śrīla Prabhupād. At the same time, he holds himself responsible if any of his disciples deviates from the path of Vaiṣṇav practice. Seeing the transgressions or the absence of Vaiṣṇav mood in some of his disciples, many a time he has cried privately or he has pleaded with them with great humility. Sometimes he has lamented that he has given Hari-nām to a few people who were unworthy of it, and that is why he is suffering. But he does not give up on anyone. Śrīpād Gopīnāth Prabhu remembers that one of his Godbrothers went overseas and got married there. After a few years he came with his two children to see Mahārāj in Purī. By talking to him, Mahārāj could understand that he had given up his spiritual practice and was being maintained luxuriously by his wife. After he left, Mahārāj started lamenting to Gopīnāth Prabhu about this. He said, "Mahāmāẏā (the great illusory energy) has ruined his spiritual life completely." But Mahārāj said he himself was actually responsible for this, since he was his guru. He quoted the famous verse gurur na sa sẏāt (Śrīmad Bhāgavatam 5.5.18). Then he told Gopīnāth Prabhu, "Call him back again. I want to talk to him some more." When the disciple came back again, Mahārāj talked to him for a long time about the spiritual practice of a Vaiṣṇav. Then he practically pleaded with him, with great humility and sincerity: "Bābā, please don't give this up again."
In case some of Mahārāj's disciples neglect their devotional practices and their Guru's mission because of their material attraction and their "family" relationships, he says, "In this world we get attached to the wrong things, thinking by loving some people or some things we will be happy. But this is a great mistake. Ultimately these objects of our affection and attention will only cause us suffering." So he has indicated that those who stay away from Guru and his mission due to some other interests are actually depriving themselves of their true happiness. On the occasion of the disappearance festival of Śrīla Prabhupād, he wrote:
"One who felt deep love for the lotus feet of Śrī Guru, immersed oneself in the ocean of pure devotional Hari-kathā of Śrī Guru, and made all efforts in one's conduct and preaching to fulfill the desire of Śrī Guru, was fortunate enough to have the joy of union---the joy of an intimate relationship when Śrī Guru was manifested in this world. It is in the heart of such a person that today, after the disappearance of Śrī Guru, the intense pain of separation burns. It is the core of that heart which is crying; it is those eyes which are shedding tears like the monsoon rain. Alas, today that heart is restless and desperate to drink the nectar of Hari-kathā coming from the lotus mouth of Śrī Guru."
Mahārāj has made it clear by his instructions that a disciple is supposed to listen to Gurudev and then fulfill Gurudev's desires by obeying his orders. In Gurudev's absence, one can take instruction from the representatives of Gurudev. But one should not whimsically start some project just because one feels like it. Sometimes disciples with an independent mood think of something on their own, and having made up their minds about it, they inform Gurudev of what they are about to do and simply ask him for his "blessings". Later they may think they have done something to please Gurudev, but this is self-deception.
Also, one should understand that Gurudev would not give the same order to everyone. If Gurudev orders one disciple to write books and glorifies this service, this does not mean everyone should write books. If he orders another disciple to build a temple and install Deities there, this does not mean everyone can do that. When ŚrīJagadiś Prabhu asked Mahārāj what his service would be, Mahārāj told him, "Try to serve the Vaiṣṇavs." When Lalitā Didi of South Africa asked Mahārāj the same question, Mahārāj said, "Chant Hare Kṛṣṇa and mind your own business." If one sincerely wants to serve Gurudev's mission, one should try to find out from Gurudev and his close associates what one should do, instead of determining one's own service.
Even when one does not have any particular service to do, if one listens to Gurudev's vāṇī with deep attention and meditates on it, one can fill one's day and one's life by rendering some devotional service to fulfill Gurudev's desire. No one should feel they have time to waste or the need for distractions. There is no question of complacency in the life of a devotee. Mahārāj always says, niśvāse viśvās nei ("One cannot trust one's breath (because it may be the last breath).")
On the other hand, even when one tries to fulfill Gurudev's desire, one will find many obstacles on one's path. But if one is very determined to overcome them, then by Gurudev's blessings one will achieve one's goal. Mahārāj says, śreẏāṁsi bahu-vighnāni---"Many obstacles arise when one tries to do something good."
Mahārāj also wants his disciples to stay within the limits of their present realizations and devotional qualifications. When some disciples came from the West and inquired from him about such confidential matters as siddha-praṇālī, Śrīla Purī Mahārāj was very displeased. He said that Śrīla Prabhupād would never tolerate anadhikār charchā (engagement in something beyond one's understanding and spiritual qualifications). He asked why these disciples, who could not even properly practice their daily devotional bhajan and could not chant the recommended rounds of japa, should concern themselves with such a high and confidential devotional process? He remarked that those who have such propensities are not devotees but kapaṭīs (impostors). He wants his disciples to remember that devotion develops through krama (stages). In this regard he quotes the following verses:
kona bhāgẏe kona jīver `śraddhā' yadi haẏ
tabe sei jīv `sādhu-saṅga' karaẏ
sādhu-saṅga haite haẏ `śravaṇ-kīrtan'
sādhan-bhaktẏe haẏ `sarvānartha-nivartan'
anartha-nivṛtti haile bhaktẏe `niṣṭhā' haẏ
niṣṭhā haite śravaṇādẏe `ruchi' upajaẏ
ruchi haite bhaktẏe haẏ `āsakti' prachur
āsakti haite chitte janme kṛṣṇa prītẏ-aṅkur
sei `rati' gāṙha haile dhare `prem'-nām
sei premā---`praẏojan' sarvānanda-dhām
--Śrī Chaitanẏa-charitāmṛta: Madhẏa-līlā 23.9-13
"If, by good fortune, a living entity develops faith in
Kṛṣṇa, that living entity begins to associate with
devotees. When one is encouraged in devotional service by the
association of devotees, one becomes free from all unwanted
contamination by following the regulative principles and chanting and
hearing. When one is freed from all unwanted contamination, one
advances with firm faith. When firm faith in devotional service
awakens, a taste for hearing and chanting also awakens. After taste
is awakened, a deep attachment arises, and from that attachment the
seed of love for Kṛṣṇa grows in the heart. When that
ecstatic emotional stage intensifies, it is called love of Godhead.
Such love is life's ultimate goal and the reservoir of all pleasure."
In this connection, he also refers to the verse ādau
śraddhāḥ (Śrī Bhakti-rasāmṛta-sindhu 1.4.15-16) as well
as the verses Śrīmad Bhāgavatam 1.5.23-26.
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