Full Circle
When I was a young lad, I did not do what I wanted to do. I wanted to run free, to be part of the trees and the grass and the rivers and birds. I knew instinctively who I was. I wanted that natural happiness, to live free of unwanted imposing structures not of my designs. Instead, I trusted Them, the Others, the adult world. They soon made me sit in a small desk in school, for hour after hour, with my hands folded in front of me, to learn.
I had in my innocence found that when I just relaxed and let myself, just, “Be”, I felt ecstasy ! , or at least a broad sense of well being, like a molecular-level happy tingling sensation, all over and in me! When I spoke of this to significant others, the adults, they didn't know what to say, or acted like it was a child's imagination and ignored me, and so I soon learned not to trust or expose my inner self. I became bricked, in the wall.
When at age 6, I cried horrified tears at the sudden realization that my parents would eventually grow old and die! My mother and father could only tell me that, “That is life, son. We must all eventually die.” Oh, most reassuring! Thus began my unsettlement, and come to think, the cause of the downfall of empires.
I learned to turn away from simple satisfactions towards the passion of acquisition and competition. I eventually more-or-less fit into the environment, just as the consciousness of the jiva extends out to the parameters of any given body and field of activities, or ksetra, which the “ksetra-jna” or knower -of-the-field, the jiva-soul, spark of Godhead, inhabits, as if “...on a machine made of material energies.” ( Bhagavad Gita As It Is, A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada )
Gnostic and Kabbalistic texts say, “As above, so below”, Sri Isopanisad says, “ isavasyam idam sarvam... “, - so it is widely understood by theistic mystics that Lord Krsna expands into every nook and corner, IS every nook and corner. Yet he is aloof from all this, being atmarama, or self-satisfied. But whereas He is in full knowledge, the jivas which emanate from Him, are dependent upon Him, except in their stupified mayic dreams! These bound non-different complete units are free when in their Krsna-intended spiritually charged state, but are subject to be illusioned by the grander energy of goddess Maya in their artificially seperated-from-Krsna state, called embodied material existence. Mayadevi is not a conditioned soul, but an enlightened dear devotee of Lord Vishnu, Mother of Sri Ganesha, and wife of Lord Siva We can be overcome by her immense intelligence and potencies, or we can be released by God's Grace.
Meanwhile, back inside the embodied me, Johnny Cash's records, which I had played since age 4, had linked with a new inner resentment. Angst unnamed arose amid all that forced enculturation into demon-crazy. Alienated remembrances of my lost inner emotional intelligence, which had been bound and tamed by social pressures, lay just beneath the surface. Like that old Folsom prisoner; I could identify at a root level with this image. I was the prisoner, yearning for his lost freedom. Music to me began to mean a chance to break out of the too-restrictive cage of my adopted social behaviors, a hope for freedom, a return to something better!
When 60's rock came along, the enlivened sound, which I could so identify with, started to re-energize the Johnny Cash inner me. Not to my awareness of the mechanism, at the time, but now I can look back and understand better. Rock was a transformation of the country/blues of my instinctive inner Cash, to the wider circle of knowledge and activities of the Cultural Revolution of the Peace Generation.
These inner actions ultimately effected and transformed a whole cohort of world-wide society, and in due course actualized my own renewed sense of identity. Our generation acted out a return from the oppression of our deepest human and spiritual nature. Our fathers had embraced homogenous and rigid social stuctures, which involved blatantly capitalist and Darwinistic paradigms of thought. During times of war and economic difficulties, these rascist and sectarian organizations were considered necessary for survival and capital advancement. Now, we could see that this way of thinking strangled individualism and freedom of thought and expression.
But we broke the molds, renewed our ideals! We wanted it right! We rose to the occasion, spontaneously launched a bloodless revolution!
By His arrangements, Srila Prabhupada brought the perfected path to us timely; the sankirtana movement of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, and Bhagavad Gita AS IT IS. This was what we had waited for all our lives, what we were set-up for, to do what we must do in Srila Prabhupada's service. “jivera svarupa haya; nityera krsnadasa!” ( the eternal soul is the eternal devotee of Krsna ) We were re-born! In degrees of our fortune, the inner self again became the outer, as well. Haribol, prabhus.
We could never begin to repay Srila Prabhupada, who appeared to fulfill the destiny and ambitions of a whole generation of young idealists in America. He truly saved us from the prisons within and without. No one else did it, He alone! He and his Inner Guide. They accomplished this deliverance over the entire planet, saving billions! of people. Other preachers now merely ride through, in his dust, through the train tunnel which he punched through the mountainside of global Maya. No one can do this unless they are more powerful than she; only the Supreme Being and his pure devotee could do this inconceivable thing, Srila Prabhupada, our guiding father, the unstoppable power and mercy, our great conquering Vaisnava General.
We his many disciples have experienced Vaisnava salvation at his hands.
That is why HDG 108 A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupada's disciples will never run out of steam, will never just be quiet, will never just sit back and allow SP's mission and followers to fall into foolishness, will never compromise in following Srila Prabhupada and his original teachings As They Are, will never agree to anybody's brainwash program, and ultimately, will never die.
Jumping ahead now, to the current context;
The joyous unfolding and deepening of character which Srila Prabhupada had enacted in us, by dint of his order to serve Lord Sri Krsna, suddenly is assaulted by the unbelievable! The pure intended structure of association of Srila Prabhupada's disciples suddenly largely ceases to exist, externally!
The purity, love, and mutual purpose, which formed the inner all-attractive body of Iskcon, are tainted by some who thought they could out-think even the master. Srila Prabhupada is now partially replaced by some Precocious Jesuses, and instead of service, with cooperation and preaching, there is too much grandstanding by greedy Usurpers for paisa, power, position, property, -----.
Let us tell the truth; Our father's house is ransacked.
Open istagosthis are gone, fear and reticence have entered, the new-age GBC sanctioned cults of personality blindly rule. Everyone has an opinion, and none are the same. In some places, Prabhupada's orders and also his disciples are shamelessly belittled or ousted by cadres of cultists in control....
But in the long term, they are not the controllers.
Externally, the buildings are still there, the Deities rest peacefully inside. Radha's kitchen is still there, there are even devotees and kirtana. But, Maya's joke!; this temple association structure of bricks has been re-inhabited by a prehistoric breed of persons ! It is now again more like the slaughterhouse school, where we once were made to sit for hours and hours,
in quiet little No-Talking! rows
with our hands folded,
to learn.
Replies
Admittedly, there are nowadays almost as many Christians as "Hindus", a term you guys, and the Islamists, invented for "us" ! Now in this body, i am identifying with Vedic culture. We modern Caitanyaite Vaisnavas, like Christian idealists, are not caste conscious. We also seek to deliver the most fallen and the suffering ones. I think this sort of open-mindedness to other cultures is essential to success in spreading widely throughout human society. No one wants to be subsumed as a low-caste group in another's hierarchical beurocratic system of religion; hmmm.
Come to think of it, over time as the cult establishes itself in a given culture, it then usually seeks to acquire the local cultural symbols and recognition of influence and position. Many impressed and acquisitive sycophants to the now big rich churches arise, among the pious clergy, and they enable themselves somehow or other to become the new entrenched upper oppressive class, and again put down the peasants in a renewal of the cyle of dharma, artha, kama, moksa. Always, control of the money is key to ambition, always the greedy viscious ones rise to the top.
Renunciation is therefore key to our remaining unaffected by the modes of material nature. Where the objects of sense gratification are, the desirous will migrate and engage in schemes to control and monopolize their desired situation. Thus, we go from pure renounced preachers, to self-satisfying priests in a hierarchical Church. Then again there is some reform, or there is an ongoing motif in which both the renounced and the fat cat priests are accomodated. Sounds like India to me! In Goonda boys Iskcon, the demons are often so demonic, they cannot realize a compromise with the renunciants, and so they fight instead, demanding God-like status and obediences.
The Christians, by having only Jesus, can avoid this attempt to be God by mere humans at least, while we Vaisnavas are more susceptible to this particular manipulation, as we see nowadays practically. We honor even our simple brahmanas very nicely. However, the ritvik neophytes and devotees who strictly follow Srila Prabhupada are also relieved of some of these cheating effects. Hare Krsna
w
When reading this article,I was reminded of early school days.
At that time, when entering teen years, most everyone considered me the wild one, quite crazy .
Canning was the punishment dished out at the time, myself being a great role model for those who wished to learn the way of the sting.
The more they beat me , the stronger I got.
As far as scholarly examinations went, I was somewhere around bottom of the class.
The girl with the thick glasses and hearing aid was the only one who was normally in a lower grade.
Science was my best subject, as I had a strong interest in how things worked.
At the time, the written examinations went for so long, hours.
Generally, I would go to the easy questions, ponder a few others,then just sit for an hour or two,waiting for the bell to ring, without making even a slight effort to achieve a higher grade.
As time would tick by very slowly , holding my breath, and watching the big clocks hands move so slowly, became a way to pass the time.
How long could one breath be stretched out?
Two and a half minutes was my own personal record.
Somehow , this process put my mind in a nice peaceful place, as yogic breathing does.
It was hard not to do, because once I stopped , the mind would become distracted in so many ways, as a monkey does.
At this time,Srila Prabhupada's mercy was becoming wide spread in the land of the endless frown {Australia.]
Somehow or other, a small business sized card found its way into my idle hands, with and invitation to a free love feast.
Free love sounded good to me at the time, as most girls would never be seen on the same street as me, reputation and the rest.
On the other side of the card, was this strange request.
Chant HARE KRSHNA, HARE KRSHNA, KRSHN KRSHNA,HARE HARE.
HARE RAMA HARE RAMA, RAMA RAMA, HARE HARE and be happy.
No longer did I have to look at the clock, or hold my breath, I just kept chanting this mantra, experiencing a gradual transformation.
As Srila Prabhupada's books were scarce at the time, especially in the town I lived, [which was and still is remote rural sheep country], all I had was this mantra,with no idea of any other aspects of understanding.
Being sheep country, the only response from the locals was Bhaa.
Once my class teacher told me that the Hare Krshnas were strange guys and gals,who ran up and down the street in their pajamas singing all day.
Were these were the people I should find?.
Little did I know that I would one day, I also would be in my pajamas , singing in the streets.
The point being, one little card, one mantra, and the enthusiastic preachers of the time,had found a place for this wretchd soul, in Srila Prabhupad's family, the big family
Even now,as I type this,I pray that I never forget the pains of ignorance, and the inability to see anything except
fitting into normal society.
"On the other side of the card, was this strange request.
Chant HARE KRSHNA, HARE KRSHNA, KRSHN KRSHNA,HARE HARE.
HARE RAMA HARE RAMA, RAMA RAMA, HARE HARE and be happy.
No longer did I have to look at the clock, or hold my breath, I just kept chanting this mantra, experiencing a gradual transformation."
"Little did I know that I would one day, I also would be in my pajamas , singing in the streets." MMd; We had our own version; bed sheets dyed orange and rubber boots!