Srila Prabhupad Saraswati Thakur: On Householders
Question: How should one live in one's house?
Śrīla Prabhupād Bhaktisiddhānta Saraswatī Ṭhākur: One can destroy his tendency to fall into the dark pit of materialistic household life by having the beneficial association of the great saints. Only by associating with liberated souls does one achieve the qualifications to become a transcendental householder (pāramārthika gṛhastha). Those who do not associate with the devotee bhāgavata (the Lord residing in His devotee) and the book bhāgavata (the Lord residing in the scripture Bhāgavata), which are non-different, cannot have a beneficial life, living in their own homes.
It is good to live in one's own house with the desire to serve the Lord; then one can serve the Lord properly. But this is not possible for the illusioned householder attached to money, the opposite sex, and name and fame. One should enter into his house resolving to serve Krishna. That is much better than false renunciation. Nothing good can come from false renunciation. If one's household life is favorable for devotional service then that is acceptable; on the contrary, if it is unfavorable for devotional service, then such a deep, dark pit called “home” should be given up. But if one wants to show off his desire for renunciation and shows some detachment then that is not beneficial. Such an immature renunciate will fall from his position in a few days.
The tendencies of the illusioned householders can only be destroyed by associating with the devotees. Those who enter into household life following the rules of the external world will be more and more absorbed in the illusioned condition. Just as the devotees of the Lord need to enter into the sannyāsa āśrama (the lifestyle of a renunciate), in the same way they need to enter into the gṛhastha āśrama (the lifestyle of a householder). The festival known as gṛhapraveśa (entering a house for the first time) should be celebrated only by a devotee householder, not a non-devotee householder. When a devotee enters his house we should know that he has actually entered his maṭh. For a devotee there is no difference between entering his house and entering a maṭh. But there is a heaven-and-hell difference between a devotee's entering his house and a non-devotee's entering his house.
One should enter one's house only to always engage oneself in the service and thoughts of Krishna, and to have everything favorable for that. The householder should always stay away from bad association and gossip. He should nurture with great care such qualities as enthusiasm, determination, and patience, and such devotional practices as hearing and chanting (śravana-kīrtana). To serve Hari, Guru and Vaiṣṇava, to chant Śrī Nāma, to associate with the sādhus, and to hear about the Lord are the essential duties of householders. If all their endeavors are directed toward the service of the Lord, then they will definitely benefit, they will be protected and their lives will be fulfilled.
Excerpt translated from the Bengali book:
Prabhupād, Śrīla Bhaktisiddhānta Saraswatī Ṭhākur, Śrīla Prabhupāder Upadeśāmṛta (Nectar of Śrīla Prabhupāda's Instructions), collected by Tridaṇḍi Swāmī Śrīmad Bhakti Mayukha Bhāgavat Mahārāj. 3rd ed. Māyāpur, Nadiyā: Tridaṇḍi Swāmī Śri Bhakti Pramod Paryaṭak Mahārāj, Śrī Chaitanya Maṭh, 1990.
translated into English by Devamaẏī dāsi.
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